66. when you know you know

Transcript

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Welcome back, beautiful souls, to Spirituality in the City, episode 66. Have you ever made a spur-of-the-moment decision that turned out to be exact? Or perhaps you ignored a nagging feeling that later proved to be spot on? Maybe you've had voices in your head urging you to leave a career and pursue your dreams. Or you might be one of the lucky ones who experienced a serendipitous moment knowing you were in the right place at the right time with the right person. I think many of us have had these feely feels at some point in our lives. It's as if we knew things we didn't consciously understand, but we felt them deeply. I often think, when you know, you know. Some say the woman's intuition is a powerful gift that allows us to see beneath the surface. Many times, it guides us through the uncertainties and the ambiguities of life. I don't believe it's just a feeling. It's almost like a knowing that comes from within. Some people, not only women, have a special ability to listen to their inner voice. The intuition is something that cannot be explained. It cannot be measured or quantified. It cannot be forced or rushed. It cannot be taught by our parents or teachers. It cannot be learned in school or from books. It cannot be brought or borrowed. It's also what we call our gut feeling. Whenever I'm drawn to something, someplace, or someone, I believe this is my inner compass leading me. is this incredible awareness that obviously transcends logic and reasoning. In our world filled with noise and distractions, the power of intuition can illuminate our paths and help us make decisions that align with our truest selves. Some say intuition is the whisper of the heart, while others view it as the best friend we'll ever have. When I connect with my inner voice, I gain a better understanding of myself and what truly matters to me, leading me towards a more authentic and meaningful life. However, in the empirical environment we live in today, many people prioritize data and logic, choosing to follow their rational minds instead of their sentimental hearts. After living in an ashram for over a year and practicing meditation daily to tame my monkey mind, I was all about listening to my heart and trusting my instincts. That was the reason I left my previous career, to do inner work for myself. When I finally decided to return to the outside world, I moved to Hong Kong. The contrast was striking. Light to dark, day to night, Yin to yang, silence to noise, solitude to crowd, internal to external, slow living to constant activity. Pretty much the two opposite ends of the spectrum. Upon my arrival in this beautiful, vibrant city, I honestly had a difficult time fitting into the extremely fast-paced hustle lifestyle. The first thing I learned after starting work was the difference in emotional expressions or the lack thereof compared to people at the ashram or even those in the West where I'm from. The Asian cultural norm discourages overt expressions leading to a preference for more logical discussions and a downplaying of intuitive feelings. I have a friend who often advises me on how to survive in this deadpan environment. He says, for Chinese people, even if they don't like you, they will still have a smile on their face and they will never show you their true feelings. Meanwhile, in the West, I'm accustomed to people sucking their teeth, rolling their eyes, distancing themselves from you or outright confronting you if they don't like you. I often wonder which approach is better. For me, authenticity and genuine connections are incredibly important. I find it challenging to relate to people who aren't being their true selves. I truly appreciate honesty and sincerity in all my relationships. However, I suppose being polite and maintaining harmony can also be very positive. especially in corporate and other professional environments. Every culture has its own way of dealing with people and navigating this world. After living in Asia for a period of time, I began to understand why my parents and Asian people in general prioritize logic and rationality over intuitive feelings. Our culture is rooted in collectivism, which emphasizes group harmony, societal expectations and conformity over personal desires. As a result, decisions are often made based on practicality and their potential impact on the whole. I know many Asians settle down with partners who meet a solid checklist and gain approval from family and friends rather than choosing someone they truly love. At the same time, I've seen too many couples remain in unfulfilled marriages because of their parents or children, which I guess can be seen as a positive for the family as a whole. Divorce rates are certainly lower in Asia compared to the West. Asians also value rationality because it provides a greater sense of control. Structured plans and strategies can be created, which I can understand feels much more comforting than the unpredictability associated with intuitive feelings. Of course, there's also the Asian mom factor with their sky-high expectations, which you probably heard me mention before. This creates an environment where emotional considerations are secondary to pragmatism. It's safe to say that most of my friends and peers were encouraged to pursue careers in fields perceived as secure and prestigious, such as medicine, law, engineering, or anything related to business and finance, rather than being motivated to explore creative or unconventional paths based on their interests. I remember back in school in the States, everyone would copy homework from Asian kids who had just immigrated. whom we call fresh off the boat. If you were going to cheat on an exam, you better be sitting next to one of these straight-A students. This phenomena could be attributed to the educational frameworks in Asia, which tend to prioritize analytical thinking, memorization, and standardized testings. This focus on logic and rational problem solving cultivates a mindset that values objective reasoning over subjective experiences. Students are typically encouraged to seek clear, quantifiable outcomes which can diminish the value placed on intuition. There are also psychological factors at play. Asians often believe that failure can bring shame or disappointment to the family. I know I felt pressure to make decisions that are logical and safe rather than intuitive and risky. This fear fosters a reliance on rational analysis to avoid potential pitfalls rather than trusting gut feelings that might lead to uncertain outcomes. Speaking of gut feelings, did you know that this term originated from the idea that our intuition arises from physical sensations in the stomach? If you've ever experienced strong emotions such as fear or excitement and felt physical sensations in your belly, like butterflies, nausea, or a sense of tightness, then you know what I mean. These are biological responses. When people say phrases like trust your gut or follow your gut instinct, They imply that our bodies can provide insights that our rational minds might overlook. So could intuition be more than just a mental or emotional process? Could it also be a physical or bodily experience? While I believe in the importance of emotions and personal values when making decisions, I also find it challenging to trust my instinct and listen to my heart at times, especially because of the cultural factors mentioned earlier. There have been several occasions when I failed to heed my inner voice and make decisions I wouldn't have made if I had listened to my intuition. whether in my work life, love life, or anything in between. I also recognize that emotions can cloud our judgment, leading to decisions based on temporary feelings rather than a well-thought-out strategy from our rational mind. We can be influenced by our biases, and our assumptions may be incorrect. That is why my mindfulness practice is essential for bringing me back to a state of nonjudgmental awareness. Ironically, people often assume that those who love meditation must be naturally calm, open-minded, and accepting. They think we don't need meditation, but in truth, we're probably the ones who need it most. That's why we're so drawn to it in the first place, because it benefits us extensively. I'm incredibly grateful for my practice. I don't know how else I would cope with all the stresses of life. From time to time, I wonder whether my strong intuition is a gift or a challenge. Over-reliance on gut feelings has sometimes led me to neglect data or facts, resulting in decisions based on feelings rather than evidence. I also find it difficult to adhere to structured environments with strict rules and procedures, which can make me feel stifled or frustrated. I've experienced conflict, misunderstanding, and tension with logical thinkers. While I know they are often right in the grand scheme of things, I can't just simply ignore my intuitive feelings in the moment. As someone connected to the intuition, I can feel emotionally drained because I sometimes absorb others' emotions too deeply. Additionally, though I can visualize something clearly in my head, expressing it can be challenging. Just the other day, my friend was making fun of me. Whenever we dive into a deeper topic, and let's say she asks me a contemplative question, my answer would always be, it's hard to explain. One reason for this is that when you know, you just know. Just like how have you ever met a soulmate? you might not even be able to explain why. You may notice that some people are more intuitive, while others are more the opposite, sensor-oriented. This dichotomy influences how we perceive information, gather data, and make decisions, leading to different approaches in various situations. According to personality types, sensors focus on concrete facts, details, and the present moment. They are practical, realistic, and grounded in experience, usually relying on their five senses and preferring hands-on learning and direct observation. Conversely, intuitives tend to focus on patterns, possibilities, and the bigger picture. They are more abstract, imaginative, and future-oriented, often thinking about concepts, theories, and long-term implications. If you're unsure which type you are, you can always take one of those MBTI tests online. Intuitives are typically creative types. Think artists, writers, and musicians who often rely on their emotions and instincts to feel their work. Highly empathetic individuals are attuned to the feelings of others and usually make decisions based on their impact on those around them. Idealistic individuals focus on values and dreams, allying with their vision of a better world. Romantics take risks for love and prioritize emotional connections in their relationships. Spiritual seekers also tend to make heart-based decisions as they search for deeper meaning in life. Although I grew up in an Asian family, I am definitely the intuitive type who almost without a doubt listens to my heart over my head, sometimes to a point where I need to ground myself and find balance with logical reasoning. After starting my yoga and mindfulness journey, my awareness heightened, enhancing my intuitive abilities and allowing me to better tune into my inner voice. Yoga helped me cultivate a stronger connection between my body and mind, enabling me to recognize subtle sensations and feelings more readily. Meditation and breathing practices guide me into a peaceful and calm state. providing clarity to see beyond our five senses, our six sense. If you're into mindfulness, you know that a nonjudgmental approach to our thoughts and feelings create a safe space for intuitive insights to emerge without fear of criticism or doubt. These practices and intuition are deeply interconnected. Therefore, it's possible to develop a strong intuition if you wish to nurture your intuitive abilities. What I love about intuition is that it helps us recognize and guides us towards the right time, the right place, and the right people in our lives. This alignment often leads to transformative experience in relationships that feel destined. Knowing when the time is right for a decision or action can be a matter of intuition. Signs might manifest as a sense of urgency, a feeling of readiness, or a gentle push from within. This awareness can help us recognize when opportunities arise and when to seize them, whether it's a job. a social setting, an opportunity, or a new adventure, trusting my instincts about where I feel most at home and at ease can significantly impact my happiness and fulfillment. Perhaps the most significant aspect of intuition is its role in relationships. Recognizing the right people in our lives often involves a deep sense of connection that transcends logical reasoning. This may manifest as instant chemistry, shared values, or a feeling of familiarity. Trusting our intuition can lead to more meaningful relationships. While intuition helps us know, it's also important to know that life is, after all, all about balance, and we need a blend of both emotional understanding and rational reasoning. My cultural background and surroundings have helped me foster a more balanced perspective that values both rational thinking and intuitive insights. When I navigate my life with both logic and heart, I make decisions that are more holistic, fulfilling and practical, meaningful and sustainable, which benefits my overall well-being. As you move forward, remember to trust your instincts, embrace the unexpected, and allow your intuition to illuminate the path ahead, all while grounding your choices in thoughtful reasoning. The life that awaits is filled with possibilities, and when you know, you truly know. Thank you for tuning in to Spirituality in the City today. I hope this episode offered a fresh perspective on the power of intuition. I'll see you in the next episode Namaste